Idol Replacement Judges: Who Will, Who Can Replace Simon Cowell?:
1. Elton John: Pop Legend: Pros: One of the only performers on the planet with inarguable icon status. A friend of the show, whose music has been used and who most recently appeared as a guest performer on the Idol Gives Back telethon, it has been reported that he is the favorite of Idol producers. His hiring would certainly create a splash worthy of the moment, and his saucy style could fit well into the Idol mix. Perpetually active, although retired from recording his own albums, one could well picture him enjoying this new kind of limelight. Also, he would bring an unquestionable knowledge of the music world. Cons: The question of whether a star as big as he would truly roll up his sleeves and do the hard work of judging, being willing to be the recipient of boos as Cowell as was. In a show, like all shows, perpetually trying to reach younger audiences, he's not exactly Justin Bieber. Odds: 4 - 1
2. Tommy Mottola: Music Executive: Pros: As the man who discovered (and married) Mariah Carey, he brings talent scout bona fides to the table. Nikki Finke reported back in January that he had all but closed the deal on the job. Cons: Despite that report, there is no sign of a deal. Mottola may bring music credentials, but he is largely unknown outside the industry. And it's been a few years since his last big thing. Odds: 40 - 1
3. Clive Davis: Music Industry Legend: Pros: Would bring the show an authoritative godfather-like presence. Cons: The aged, semi-retired mogul is definitely not the face of Idol's young viewers. A fraught history with some Idol alumni, including Prodigal Daughter Kelly Clarkson, could make for some awkward chemistry. Odds: 30 – 1
4. Neil Patrick Harris: Actor: Pros: NPH impressed many in his stint as guest judge during the Idol audition tour with just the right mix of causticity and enthusiasm. Thanks to his Emmy and Tony hosting duties, the former child star has transformed himself into something of a wry, witty Johnny Carson figure for a more expansive age. Cons: The person who fills the Cowell chair must be able to say, "I know what it is to make a star and I have a wall full of platinum albums to prove it." As sharp as his critiques may be, the panel already has the amateur enthusiast spot filled by Ellen. Odds: 25 - 1
5. Guy Oseary: Music Executive: Pros: As the man who has guided the careers of Madonna and Alanis Morissette, among others, his star-making ability is unimpeachable, and a decade more up to date than Clive Davis'. Cons: As Madonna's manager, Oseary has showed a career-long contentment with remaining in the background and has avoided the limelight. Having sold his label, Maverick, for a sum well in the nine-figure range, he doesn't need the money (although who couldn't use a few dozen million more?). Odds: 15 – 1
6. Jamie Foxx: Actor/Singer: Pros: Having just made his second mentor appearance on the show, Foxx has certainly proven his enthusiasm for the competition and his aggressive hands-on approach with the contestants demonstrates his strong sense of what it takes to become a star today. He is never at a loss for words or opinions. Manages to feel contemporary while retaining some gravitas. Cons: While he has dabbled in music, he remains primarily an actor. Odds: 6 - 1
7. Howard Stern: Radio Personality: Pros: A rumor widely encouraged by the star himself. The announcement would certainly make news, and the interest it would bring would be endless. Would be a bold, dice-rolling, network-shaking move that could reinvent the show for a circus-like age. One thing you could be sure of: Stern as a judge would never be boring. Cons: Stern's controversial stripper-centric persona is anathema to Idol's family audiences. While it would get attention, also risks alienating and in one swoop scaring away much of the broadest audience in television. Odds: Million - 1
8. Adam Lambert: 'Idol' Alumni: Pros: The most talked-about Idol of modern times was thought to have acquitted himself brilliantly in his recent mentor stint. There's something to be said for maintaining a hermetic universe. Why not keep it in the family, letting Idol build upon Idols of legend? Cons: An icon in the making though he may well be, Lambert's career remains a work in progress. He has excitement around him, but not yet gravitas. And he himself would probably be best served by focusing on his own music, rather than keeping his banner firmly tied to the Idol stage. Odds: 40 - 1
9. Diddy: Singer/Producer/Impresario: Pros: Probably no figure in contemporary American music fills the godfather role better than Diddy. Cons: Rambling, discursive, self-referential, often unhinged speaking style not necessarily suited to the "final arbiter" role carved out by Cowell. Odds: 35 - 1
10. Harry Connick Jr.: Singer: Pros: His able handling of the singers as mentor during Sinatra week recently sparked a Connick Jr. boomlet on the web. Certainly a smooth, compelling presence. Cons: While semi-iconic, his style is not exactly on the cusp of today's pop music trends. Odds: 40 - 1
11. Piers Morgan: Former Journalist/Judge: Pros: The Got Talent jurist—both in the U.S. and U.K.—has cast himself in the Cowell model to a tee. Cons: Bringing on "Cowell-light" will not exactly add sizzle to the Idol formula. ODDS: 70 – 1
12. Rick Rubin: Music Producer: Pros: Star-making credentials established across the decades; a singular presence in American culture. Cons: The oddness factor might be just a bit too much for Idol audiences to handle. ODDS: 70 – 1
13. Perez Hilton: Blogger: Pros: The Walter Winchell of the Paris Hilton age has been openly campaigning for the seat. With his championing of Lady Gaga's early career, he proved he has his finger on the pulse of a generation of pop consumers. Cons: As demonstrated by some of his more extravagant moments, might be a better presence behind the camera than in front. His online career built on writing "Do Me" on celeb pictures also might not be camera-ready for the broad Idol audience—though he is perhaps suited for the U.S. edition of X Factor. ODDS: 75 – 1
14. The Rest of the Field: All active music icons not mentioned above including Madonna, Mariah Carey, Beyonce, Billy Joel, Ringo Starr, Roger Daltrey, David Bowie, Johnny Rotten, Simon LeBon, Pat Benatar, Carol King, Phil Collins, and Little Richard. Pros: Star power. They are available (and bargain priced!). Cons: How seriously they would take the responsibility of being the ultimate life and death, thumbs-up/thumbs-down vote is a great unknown. ODDS: 3 – 1.
15. Returning Judge?: Kara DioGuardi: Pros: After a bumpy debutante season, Kara has won wide praise as the most astute of the Idol jurists, since her critiques the most in touch with contemporary pop. Cons: Still hasn't endeared herself to audiences on an emotional level and demonstrates an awkward, trying-too-hard chemistry with the others. - Ellen DeGeneres: Pros: Genuinely beloved on a personal level by Idol audiences. Has brought needed humor to the panel. Cons: Lacks a clear role in the group. Has neither fully embraced the "everyman" spokesperson or contestants' advocate roles that seemed her likely place. Too scripted. - Randy Jackson: Pros: Continuity—next year, he will be the last of Idol's original tribunal. Cons: Has seemed to be phoning it in for a few seasons now.
The Next Simon Cowell Is...: As American Idol’s ninth season lurches to a close, its ratings teetering dangerously, its producers, at some of their lowest moments, might be tempted to recall the words of P.G. Wodehouse’s protagonist in The Return of Jeeves. Gazing upon the misbegotten construction of Towcester Abbey, the hero muses: “You know what this house wants? An atom bomb, dropped carefully on the roof of the main banqueting hall.” Of course, an atom bomb is about to drop on American Idol: Simon Cowell will leave at the end of this season. As a consequence, Idol’s producers now face the fearsome task of filling the chair of television’s biggest star, and around whose personality television’s biggest show coalesced. It is their chance—probably their last chance—to revive the ailing juggernaut. This season’s lackluster contestants will be a memory soon enough. It is the visible, aching problem with the revamped judging panel (minus Paula Abdul, plus Ellen DeGeneres), the lack of chemistry among the jurists, that threatens to take down Idol’s future seasons. Without his traditional sparring partner in Paula, Simon largely ignores the others—except to shoot some maybe-more-nasty-than-funny barbs Kara DioGuardi’s way. Randy Jackson continues to float along, seemingly on autopilot, while Ellen has proven to be a one-liner machine of little relevance, neither offering rigorous critiques nor stepping up to the role of fierce maternal defender previously filled by Abdul. But all of this—for better or for worse—is about to change. In just two weeks, the panel will say goodbye to Simon, its cornerstone. While it had been originally expected that the announcement of his successor would be made before the season’s end, it now seems the question mark will linger into the summer.
No comments:
Post a Comment